To help in this brave battle against the homos (they recruit children you know. I saw the recruiting station, it was in-between a Bed Bath and Beyond and a vintage clothing store in Wilton Manors, Florida) I am offering some talking points for the brave fighters against the homo menace. In some cases these are general points, while in others they are specific sentences you can use (these are in quotes), as is, in your arguments on the street corner, at your church or online….
-“When two men kiss I get a funny feeling down inside and have to go watch 300 again.”
-Two men being married is unnatural whereas it is perfectly natural for nine men to want to marry Zsa Zsa Gabor.
- “I could not get Harvey Fierstein to return my phone calls.”
- “I am tired of hating only Jews and black people and variety is the spice of life.”…oh wait, that sounds kind of GAY; strike the last part of that sentence.
- “I Really, REALLY hate that ‘It’s Raining Men’ song.”
- “I had a BAD experience with a ‘woman’ I picked up on Santa Monica Blvd.”
-Mormon and magic underpants are too tight.
-“Jesus did not like homosexuals. I am certain of this despite the fact that Jesus never even mentions homosexuality in the Bible. Some QUEER obviously edited the Gospels.”
-Old Testament does mention a prohibition on homosexuality that must be played up. Feel free to ignore that it also says you should be stoned to death for not obeying your parents.
-Your former priest, now serving 20-to-life, told you homosexuality is a sin and you consider him to be an expert on the subject.
-Halloween is Satan’s favorite holiday. Who has the BEST Halloween parades and parties? You guessed it: homos.
No Gays In The Military
-In history gays always interfered with military success; such as when Alexander the Great’s bisexual army conquered half the known world. If it hadn’t been for those HOMOS he would have conquered all of it.
-Gays would never go for dressing in camo all the time.
-Gay bodies less efficient at stopping bullets.
-George Patton was not gay.
-Neither was Admiral Halsey.
-Not sure about the Duke of Wellington because he was British and they all seem gay.
-War hero, Leonard Matlovitch, recipient of the Purple Heart and Bronze Star in Vietnam, who declared his homosexuality in a letter to the Pentagon in 1975 was really just trying to get discounted Broadway tickets.
-Barry Goldwater once said that he didn’t care if soldiers were straight but only that they could shoot straight. Point out Goldwater lost the election in 1964 and it is Un-American to lose.